Never done....

Awhile ago I wrote about feeling a little bit dissatisfied with my life; about feeling a little blah (you can read all about it here).

Well, while I was vacuuming, I figured out why I was feeling a little bit antsy. Actually two thoughts popped into my head.

A) I think about a lot of weird and random stuff while vacuuming, doing dishes, folding laundry...

and B) I am not happy (granted I am not actually unhappy either), because nothing I do ever gets finished.

I miss the feeling of completion, of feeling like it is done; it is over; never have to look at it again. You know, like the feeling you get after writing the last final of the year (before the panic on how well you did or did not do sets it). It is the same feeling I got when I submitted finished projects at work.

But now, nothing I do seems to end. I vacuum, and then the rest of the family comes home, and I might as well not have vacuumed at all. The same thing happens when I clean. And don't even get me started about cooking; sometimes I feel like I am chained to the kitchen.

I realize when I worked, after one project was finished, we immediately started working on another project. However, here is the key word – ANOTHER – as in something different. Why? Because the last project is done, finished, in the past. However with housework and some other things happening right now, I feel like I am doing the same things over and over and over again.

And, I know raising a child is a job that will NEVER end. My own parents still treat me like I am a kid, and I am pretty sure that I will always be a little bit worried about my little one, even after she is all grown up with kids of her own.

But, still this does not stop me from wishing for just one moment to feel like I have finished something.

I guess the best I can hope for today is this post. As it is done, over, and posted.