Screw Date Nights

One of the things that I miss most from the time before I was a mom, and before I was married (which was so long ago that I had a pet dinosaur named Chompy) was having time by myself.

I confess that I am actually all by myself as I am typing this. However, I am constantly staring at the little clock at the top of my screen to make sure I pick my daughter up from school on time.

So, to be more specific, I miss having stress free, unscheduled time by myself. I miss being able to do what I want without the constant sound of a ticking clock reminding me that I have to drop my daughter off or pick her from school,a play date, a class ...

I miss eating crappy (but tasty), food in front of the television, right from the pot or container, without feeling guilty about not setting a good example. Granted, I can still do some of these things, but that requires me to wait until my daughter goes to bed – so I miss being a messy sloth at a reasonable hour.

And no, I do not actually hate date nights, but sometimes I just cherish the thought of not being with the kid AND NOT having to talk to someone more. I just do not want to think about or plan conversations (we have to or else we end up spending the entire evening talking about the kid). Besides, date nights usually involve planning, they require dinner reservations, or movie/show tickets, which means we must agree to a movie and a time; and even without these things, dates require booking a babysitter (sometimes this must be done months in advance...).

Alone time involves a bowl of food, of some sort, pyjamas and a television remote – no child care is needed because the other parent has the kid.

So now, every once in a while, for the sake of my sanity, I ask my husband to take the small child out for the day or evening. I like to tell myself that I am doing this because it is good for them to have some daddy and daughter time.

In reality, I use this time alone to recharge my batteries. Sometimes I even miss them a little bit. Now if missing them a little, along with a little break, allows me to be a better and more attentive parent, can you imagine what a wonderful parent I will be if I get a week off!

(To be honest, there is no way I will last a week without my family, but a night or two is worth a try...)

Planning ahead...

So, the other day I received a notice in the mail about... SUMMER CAMP!

Yep, the calendar still says January; it is freezing cold outside; and someone decided that I should start planning for summer activities. I guess in a way it makes sense, since I am thinking about escaping to somewhere warm... on-the-other-hand I still have CHRISTMAS presents that I have not given out yet!!

Is it me or are marketing/sales people trying to push us to plan ahead. I swear I see signs for back to school sales at the end of June; when kids are still in school (granted, I admit I do start doing a back to school countdown by July 1); and every year, Christmas stuff starts showing up in stores earlier and earlier. I think I see holiday decorations in Costco in August!

I understand the need to plan ahead, but I think this is getting a bit ridiculous.

For me, this constant reminder that I have to keep planning, or doing something, whether it is deciding on which summer camp to send my child, what halloween costume to make, or what Christmas gifts to buy makes me feel very anxious. I have enough trouble thinking about what to make for dinner tonight!

Sometimes I wonder whatever happened to just taking a breath, and living and enjoying the moment (hopefully that moment is quiet and I have a nice cup of coffee, or a glass of wine in my hand)?

So I say screw thinking about summer camp, for now; I can always do it next week...

How far do you start planning ahead for things (I am usually exceedingly happy and proud of myself if I book my kid into a camp a week before it starts...)?

Is there fun in fundraising?

It is that time of year again... and I do not mean Fall... It is the time of year that I start receiving emails and letters asking for money, donations, and volunteer time from my daughter's school. I believe in helping to enhance my kid's education, and think getting involved is a good idea... but...

I am a lazy person. There, I said it. I also procrastinate, and have a great talent for being able to accomplish nothing for long periods of time (but that is another story).

Anyway, being lazy means I do not always like to help out at school, and when I do help, I would like to do the least amount of work as possible. I also complain, as in bitch, a lot.

However, despite the complaints/bitching, I think deep down I do kind of like volunteering. I really like hanging out with some of the mothers (and nannies) at the school, and volunteering means that I can talk, okay gossip, with them for more than the five minutes we have during drop-offs and pick-ups, and who knows, I may actually get to meet new people.

And, last year, I volunteered once every two weeks in my kid's class. It was a great opportunity to see her at 'work' and to meet her little friends; and I can now match faces to names (my daughter likes to call every kid she meets 'friend' so we have lots of 'friends' but no real way to tell them apart, which makes scheduling play dates challenging – here is our typical conversation: daughter, “My friend invited me to her house.” Me, “Great, what's her name?” Daughter, “I don't know... my friend, the one with the hair...”). Being in the class was actually a lot of fun, as long as I armed myself with lots of headache medication prior to entering the classroom...

So, I guess I really should stop whining and just embrace helping out more. I want to teach my daughter that helping others and being involved in your community is a good thing.

On the other hand, as one the other moms suggested, I am also quite happy to just write the school a cheque at the beginning of the school year and forego this fundraising stuff.

Now, if you please excuse me... I have to go bake some cookies...  

To Clean or Not to Clean…. I choose only clean when you have to….

Ahhh… today is one of those rainy, lazy, stay at home days. You know, those days that you want to wrap yourself up in a blanket, with a hot drink in hand, and a comfy spot in front of the television all day.

On the other hand, today is also one those rainy days that I should probably get started on the ever growing list of things I have to do around the house… like actually being able to see my dining room table underneath the mountain of newspapers, fliers, and possibly those polite letters asking for money….

I have read those tips on how to keep your home tidy in ten minutes a day, and how to keep you house and life organized. Yeah right, I think I was able to follow those suggestions for about ten minutes before something else distracts me (including writing this blog at this very moment).

The only thing that ever works for me, when it comes tidying the house, is to invite people over; and I mean people, as in, not family (my family is so accustomed to my level of messiness that if they do not see dirty socks in the hallway, they already think the house has been cleaned).

So I admit it, the main reason why I entertain is to get my ass in gear to clean and tidy the house. So welcome spring, welcome BBQ season, and welcome to a cleaner house.

Note:

We do not live in a complete pigsty. I do the laundry regularly; we all have clean underwear (most of the time). And, we eat from clean dishes, granted the dishes are pulled right from the drying rack and never off the shelves… and occasionally, you will hear the sound of a vacuum cleaner coming from my house.